How To Support A Parent With Cancer

How To Support A Parent With Cancer – When a parent has cancer, children should be part of the conversation. Tips for talking to children about illness.

Cancer can be uncertain. But one thing is clear, communication with children is essential when a parent is sick.

How To Support A Parent With Cancer

“Depending on the child’s developmental level, the child may think the cancer is their fault or the cancer is contagious,” says Madison McTevia, a child life specialist at the University of Michigan Comprehensive Cancer Center. a language they understand and make sure they know who to go to with their questions.”

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In general, children can sense changes in the family routine and if their parents are worried or angry. It is always better to talk to your child soon after receiving a diagnosis than to wait. Honest communication about cancer builds trust and makes it more likely that your child will come to you with questions or concerns.

Talking to older children first can help provide a source of support for younger children. McTevia also offers the following suggestions.

McTevia directs the Families Face Cancer program, which works with the American Cancer Society and the Cancer Support Community of Greater Ann Arbor to provide parents with information on how to talk to children of all ages about a cancer diagnosis.

McTevia counsels patients at the Cancer Center and provides advice and information based on the child’s age. If a family has four children, they most likely have four different ways of saying it, he says, with younger children needing simpler language and older children sometimes preferring privacy and time to process the information.

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She also shares coping activities for children to back up or act after learning their parent has cancer.

“Usually every patient has a specific concern, like a younger child playing at school. Many worry that they’re not doing it right,” says McTevia. “Getting support or getting resources means talking to kids will be one less thing to worry about during treatment.” Post Category – Family Life Family Life Post Category – Wellness Wellness – Post Category – Health Health

When Taylor’s wife was diagnosed with stage IV cancer, they had just moved to a new place and their daughter was barely 1. Here are her tips for husbands hoping to keep it together when you find out your wife has cancer.

As Breast Cancer Awareness Month comes to a close, we wanted to provide another perspective from all the amazing women who have bravely shared their stories. Today we heard from a husband whose wife fought a terrible battle with stage IV melanoma when their daughter was just 1 year old. From confronting the worst questions (“What will happen if I die and our daughter doesn’t remember me?”) to Taylor, she shares her own experiences and advice for spouses who want to support a partner with cancer , and he remembers that you. need to take care of yourself.

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A few weeks ago, my wife asked me to go to the movies. But the catch was that we each had to go separately. My wife, Melinda, went to a screening in the afternoon after work at five, and I picked up our four-year-old daughter from school. Then I made the transition to the parking lot just in time for the next show and went to see the movie by myself.

A film symbolizing our last three years together. Breakthrough was about the life and work of Dr. James Allison, an immunologist and researcher who won the Nobel Prize in 2018 for his pioneering work in the field of cancer treatment.

For us, Dr. Allison became a hero. And last night this documentary was played in Denver, Colorado, we had time to sit quietly in reflection as his story was told, slowly closing a chapter in the darkness that has darkened our lives for the past three years .

After struggling to make ends meet in the ever-changing city of San Francisco, we decided to change our lifestyle and ditch the more than two-hour daily commute, rising prices, and exorbitant rent in favor of a more relaxed pace of life. and a new job. in North Carolina. It was all so that our newborn daughter could have a better life and spend more time with her.

Viva Foundation For Children With Cancer

My wife accepted a position across the country in North Carolina and we moved and settled. His journey took only ten minutes. Our daughter was with a wonderful nanny who allowed me to work remotely as a writer. We found our dream home, then we are

, they said. A few weeks before the shutdown, he was coughing and not feeling well. Many doctor visits led to prescribed allergy medications and the decision that we landed in North Carolina just in time for the nasty allergy season.

But it was not half. He was weaker and more tired. He began to feel pain in strange places – his hip and chest. By some strange miracle, our daughter kept the pneumonia going and my persistence took her to another doctor who ordered a chest x-ray to see if she also had pneumonia.

I was working at a local coffee shop and my wife’s voice sounded different and she was very scared. He said the doctor saw lumps on the chest X-ray. He wanted an MRI tonight. I knew right away what it was.

Kids Impacted By A Carer’s Cancer (kicc)

You see, cancer darkened our life together almost from the beginning. Right after we got married, my wife developed a strange purple lump on her arm. After repeated requests, she finally scheduled an appointment with a dermatologist. The doctor was not too afraid, but he pulled it for the test. The results were shocking and changed the course of our lives forever. It was melanoma – skin cancer.

Doctors ordered surgery to cut out a large area of ​​her arm on the side of the lump and remove a number of lymph nodes to see if the cancer had spread further up her arm and into her blood. After the operation, we learned that they received residual tumor and about a week later, we learned that the lymph nodes tested negative for melanoma. We were clean.

. After careful follow-up with oncologists and dermatologists for the next three years, we were told we had about a 90 percent chance of never seeing it again.

But when I received this call and heard that there were strange wounds on my wife’s chest, I immediately realized what we were dealing with. The melanoma came back.

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The weeks and months after those x-rays are, to be honest, a blurry nightmare that I don’t want to relive. My desire to see Melinda survive and my mental struggle with the diagnosis sent us on a journey to try to live my life, raise my daughter, work while looking for treatment options. I almost certainly had the events mixed up in retrospect.

A strange phone call from the night nurse checking Melinda’s first MRI after an X-ray sent us to the emergency room at Wake Forest Baptist Medical Center in the middle of the night. As we sat there asking for an explanation for the never known diagnosis, we got no answer. A few days later my wife was scheduled for an invasive exam to remove one of the lesions and test it.

After the procedure, my wife sat there, confused by the medicine, when the doctor came to tell us that he did not know exactly.

It was, but that it was almost certainly cancer. Given my ex-wife’s history of melanoma, we weren’t just dealing with a rogue tumor. I immediately sat on a chair with my mother-in-law, screaming, crying and distraught. It was stage IV cancer.

Impact Cancer Support Group

Coffee in Greensboro, North Carolina is clearly etched in my brain because I had another moment in a coffee shop researching options for my wife and trying to learn as much as I could about stage IV melanoma.

The numbers were really terrible and scary. I became a barrier between my wife and my family absorbing the dark, dirty and twisted details of surviving this terrifying diagnosis in order to focus on being strong and positive.

. I just can’t rest until I get answers. So I threw myself into research mode and looked for as many resources as I could. The biggest learning for me from this episode in our lives was to never settle for anything and to do whatever it took to get the best care and options for my wife.

In the pantheon of cancers, melanoma is IV. stage one of the most terrifying. While the data at the time of my wife’s recurrence was somewhat outdated—and, as we soon learned, advances in melanoma have changed dramatically—the statistics for her melanoma that were available at the time were completely defeated. For many stage IV patients, survival was measured in months.

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One of the first names I happened to hear as I sat alone in a Greensboro coffee shop with tears in my eyes was Mary Elizabeth Williams, a newly published author.

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