Why Do I Get So Upset Over Little Things – Man Gets Mad Over Little Things – 31 Causes, Effects and Ways to Deal With Your Man Who Gets Angry Over Little Things
As much as we want marriage to be a bed of roses where everything is always perfect and like fairy tales, couples live happily ever after, this is far from the truth. Conflicts will come in marriages and couples will be mean to each other simply because no two people are alike and cannot be expected to do what pleases the other all the time.
Why Do I Get So Upset Over Little Things
The best scenario we can hope for is that it is rare and these situations are resolved quickly.
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A situation where your spouse loses his temper over small things is therefore far from ideal and a situation that deserves serious consideration and needs to be dealt with as soon as possible before it destroys the marriage.
There could be several reasons why your husband gets angry over small things and some of them will be discussed here. Some of it has nothing to do with you as a partner, but since you are the closest person to him, you feel the full weight of it.
It is precisely because it affects you more that you should be the one to handle it.
To solve a problem, however, one must know its root cause. That’s why this article will try to talk about why your husband loses his temper over small things as well as what happens if you don’t fix it and finally, how you can fix it.
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One of the reasons people get angry in general is stress and this chart from the American Psychology Association (APA) shows it.
This is therefore a very valid reason why you may have an annoyed husband. There could be any number of things stressing him out such as work related problems, family problems or even financial problems.
Due to the pressure from the aforementioned problems, your spouse may get angry with other things and other people, including you.
Another reason why your husband gets angry over small things may be that he is insecure about the marriage. For example, your husband may be afraid that you are too good for him and so he expresses this disappointment by being angry with you and belittling you so that he feels he deserves you.
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Another huge issue that some men don’t seem to let in is a situation where their partner earns more than them. If you find yourself asking “why does my husband yell at me for the smallest things?” and the more you earn from him, there is a chance that this is the reason. Society has conditioned men to be the breadwinner of the family and when this is taken away from them, some of them end up fighting with their partners because they can see that they are the problem.
If you find that you and your spouse cannot easily express your feelings for each other in your marriage, it can lead to a situation where your spouse loses his temper over small things as well as big things. This is as a result of him not being able to express his feelings to you in a calm manner.
There is a chance that the reason for this is because you, as his partner, ignored his feelings when he tried to talk to you at one point by saying things like “be a man”. This can create a hateful spouse who hides his feelings behind anger.
Sometimes your husband doesn’t even know that the reason he’s angry all the time is because it was ingrained in him growing up. Maybe he grew up in an abusive home where people only spoke to each other in angry outbursts and he internalized it.
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This is often quite difficult to identify and may only prove to be a reason when professional help is sought.
Your husband may also be going through a midlife crisis where he is taking stock of his life and is unhappy with the outcome. He may be frustrated that he is not doing as well as he thinks he is at this stage of his life and takes out this frustration on small things causing him to lose his temper.
There’s also a chance that your grumpy man is a control freak who gets mad at anything he can’t control. If you’re familiar with the show “Malcolm in the Middle”, you’ll remember how Malcolm’s mother gets upset about a lot of things because she can’t stand that they’re out of her control.
It’s even worse when your husband is also a perfectionist. They will lash out at people and things they deem worthless and since you are the partner, you are directly in the firing line.
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If your spouse is cheating on you with others, you may find that your spouse resents everything you say or do. It’s because he feels that the person he’s cheating on is better than you and he hates being with you so he projects this feeling on you and other things you do.
To know if he is cheating here are signs that your husband is cheating on you with a friend.
If your husband gets angry easily, it may be because he is unhappy in the marriage and feels unable to express it in other ways.
Whether he realizes it or not, he can throw tantrums and be moody and grumpy most of the time as a way of saying he’s not happy with you and is considering leaving.
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If you find yourself constantly asking, “why does my husband get angry at everything I say?”, it could be for the very unfortunate reason that he doesn’t respect you and doesn’t see you as his equal.
Because of this, he will try to belittle you by yelling and getting angry at everything you do or say, especially when you give him an opinion. One way to tell if this is the case is if he is always sarcastic in his dealings with you.
Anger causes people to lose control and become angry with other people or things. Some people can regain control in time before doing something they regret, but others not so much.
Your husband may be one of the latter and the effect of this may be that he becomes violent towards you or your children, either physically and/or emotionally.
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If there is abuse or threats of abuse when your spouse is angry, it is normal for you and others close to you, including your children, to feel insecure around your spouse when he is angry.
The feeling of not knowing what to do when he is angry can be very harmful to you and those around you because it will lead to anxiety and other mental problems.
You can lose self-esteem when you constantly ask why your spouse is angry with you. You and other sufferers may start asking yourself if you can’t fix things so that he is always angry.
This loss of self-esteem can turn into depression which can be very damaging in the long run.
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Earlier we talked about how your husband’s upbringing can cause his mood because he can internalize the anger in his environment. The same thing can happen to your children if your spouse is constantly angry around them.
It’s no secret that children take many things from their parents and if your spouse gets angry at the smallest thing and gets angry, they don’t realize to internalize it and communicate in kind, and so creates a vicious cycle when they have children of their own.
You and your husband will almost certainly lose intimacy if he is the type to lose his temper over small things because intimacy requires feeling safe and comfortable.
If your spouse is always angry, it can be difficult to feel safe around him, which can reduce the level of intimacy between the two of you.
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If your spouse’s anger is directed at you, it can lead to you responding in kind and when that happens, arguments will follow.
The more you argue, the less communication you will have and the more angry you will both be, which will lead to a complete breakdown of communication in your marriage and when that happens, the marriage is almost over.
Feelings of insecurity, loss of intimacy and increased arguments will likely lead you and your spouse to avoid each other to reduce conflict and this will cause distance in
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